Feeling stuck and bonded in a relationship that is unhealthy. Feeling the need to change that particular person to stop an addiction or to become non-abusive. Always having repetitive, damaging fight where nobody wins Bonding is a biological and emotional process that makes people more important to each other over time. Bonding grows with spending time together, living together, eating together, making love together, having children together, and being together during stress or difficulty.
Bonding is in part why it is harder to leave an abusive relationship the longer it continues. Bonding makes it hard to enforce boundaries, because it is much harder to keep away from people to whom we have bonded.
For example: you feel stuck because the other person keeps doing destructive things, but you believe there is nothing you can do about it. You try to change the person into becoming less destructive by trying to get them to stop an addiction or become a non-abuser. You keep having repetitive, damaging fights with this person that nobody wins. You seem unable to detach from someone even though you can’t trust them or really don’t even like them.
Moreover, experiencing together extreme situations and extreme feelings tends to bond people in a special way.. Trauma bonding, is the misuse of fear, excitement, sexual feelings, and sexual physiology to entangle another person. Strangely, growing up in an unsafe home makes later unsafe situations have more holding power. It is trauma in one’s history that makes for trauma bonding.
Trauma bonding is loyalty to a person who is destructive. While the idea of bonding tends to bring up connotations of something good and beneficial, trauma bonds are unhealthy.
About The Place
The Place is where therapists, individuals and the community connect to create safety, strength and success. At The Place, men and women discover the freedom and safety to move past those issues which are preventing them from living life to its fullest. Our goal is to help each of our clients discover his or her own strengths as powerful tools in the healing process.
The Place is a multi-faceted clinic offering both individual and group therapy, support groups, interactive evenings and lectures, educational classes, and drop-in hours. Our comfortable, confidential, relaxed environment allows clients and their families to explore sensitive issues and create positive change. We believe that the key to mental health and emotional well-being is inside you.
At The Place, male and female therapists work independently or as a team to explore sensitive issues and facilitate positive change for individuals, couples and families from all sectors of the community. Some of our specialties include emotional eating, grief counseling, internet addiction, phobias, anxiety & OCD, childhood challenges, premarital counseling, couples therapy and intimacy issues, postpartum support, personality disorders, psychiatric care, and more. Connect with a caring professional in person at our comfortable Jerusalem offices, or by video, phone, and text. We’re here for you.
Phone (02) 581 8299
Whatsapp 054 260 1468